Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
