I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
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