the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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