Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
