Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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