I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
