not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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