There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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