check it out our google latitudes are spooning
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
