the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
