My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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