I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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