Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
