I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize