question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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