Your tits are I can't wait for
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Randomize
