I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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