what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Pants are for mortals
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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