Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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