after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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