How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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