This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
