I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
it glows. i had to have it.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
