i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
