Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
COCAINE IS GR8
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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