Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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