Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
