if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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