Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize
