I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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