I think my fart just growled at me.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
