So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
