so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
