You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
