The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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