Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
