According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
