As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
