This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
