Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
