I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
