btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
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he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
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I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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