Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
