I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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