i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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