So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i barfeds in our rink
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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