hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
