I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Also, beer. Big fan.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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