Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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