Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
