im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
she peed on how many people?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
My ass is underappreciated
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
